Saturday, August 15, 2015

[good] changes.

part of the thought process-aren't necessary to be used for website…. just working it out…)

Good changes. A lot of changes - but amazingly surprising changes.

Which would not have happened had God not gotten my attention during the horrible poison ivy/weed outbreak of July 2015. And the "Jonah" Bible Study by Pricella Shirer - because there is no sleeping when all you do is ooze, itch and blister.

Two and a half years ago, I took a break from major distractors in my life. Knitting had already been put on hold due to large blocks of time needed for running, so that meant what was left. I didn't watch a lot of television, but I watched some. So I cut it out for the month of January. (Note: I still don't watch much - it kind of "ruined" it for me.) I also cut out Facebook. And devoted all extra time to memorizing God's Word. I wish I could say I remembered all the scripture I learned, but the last year and a half back in school slowed that down… And just as I was gearing up to head back to nursing school - the poison hit. We were helping with a service project - and BAM! The older two girls and I got it. Each in varying amounts - thankfully mine was the worst. I would not have wanted theirs to be as bad or last as long. That would have been even worse.

I really need to back up a bit here to help this all make sense, but long story short - during my first semester in nursing school and when I wrapped my head around all my feelings regarding nursing school. Nursing school was an amazing experience, but as my studies continued, I realized that my passion for healing still remained with our own biology and how God created us - and how many times, we can heal naturally. As a nurse, my main goal would be to love and care for patients (right what I desire), but following that, a lot of what I would do centers around delivering and recognizing how medications interact with the body. I know that medications can be amazing tools-I have needed antibiotics in my life- but investing further study in medications, when my passion lyes in less medications and more discipline to understand how God created us just doesn't jive. Then as God was reminding me what my goal really was, "to serve and love people through improving their life - and hoping to share Christ in the process…" I realized that nursing wasn't my only option. God had planted a dream in my heart long before this - and maybe instead of thinking that it would come after nursing school, and after I was working as a nurse… it was time to share it with Matheau and move forward with it now.

He (God) has already proven that He will do amazing things to take care of and help my family in new and hard situations. If this is His plan, this is the time. And now we are taking steps to make it a reality. Pretty scary, but pretty awesome.

There will be more details to come. I am going to use this space to help prepare for its launch and help me weed out my thoughts and writing through the process. I just need to end this with when God brings us change. It is good change. Because He is good. All the time.

Saturday, March 7, 2015

the breath of life.

(thought process….)

Each morning I begin the day reversing my "normal" breath pattern… Instead of just breathing, I focus to take deep inhales, with time for expansion into my lungs and stomach, then wait a moment, before I slowly exhale... emptying the lungs and stomach of all the breath I just took in. Again and again-making it my intensional pattern.

It isn't easy for me. It is sometimes frustrating, because the moment my mind wanders, my breathing returns to what has been comfortable for years. And years.

Just like my breathing patterns, I have many patterns that are comfortable, but not necessarily the best option. And as I breath, I pray God continues to take those old patterns, and transform them into the patterns He desires and has planned for me - my family - my friends - and those God brings into my life.

When I started this practice, I really didn't think I had time to fit this discipline into my life. Now I love this time - in the silence to slowly learn a new and better way to live this life.